I went to a Psychiatrist today. Yep, me. When it wasn’t presented to me that I should see one, all I could think, “I’m not that bad am I?!”
I went anyways because I’m all for figuring out what is going on plus this psychiatrist looks at all options and doesn’t just throw medicine at you which is a positive to me. Let’s get in and dig into what’s going.
My psychiatrist believes in figuring out the root of the problem, is it hormone based which for me it most likely will be or am I lacking other things that are vital to my body that can cause this? So I get to do several tests to help us find the root cause and then we will set a plan from there. Fine by me, I just want to get this figured out.
Oh and I am getting a life coach! My psychiatrist believes it will help to have someone help me focus and schedule my life the way I like it.
If you know me, I grew up on a schedule and no it’s not because my parents were “those” parents. It was because I was competitive cheerleader as well as school cheerleader and we had schedules. Go to school, pick up little sister, grab food and head to cheer practice til 930 then come home and repeat. This was pretty much my life as long as I can remember and that meant that from the time I arrived at the gym at 4 until my practice at 630, I had to eat and get homework done. Yes i had a bedtime, well sorta, it was straight to bed after we got home from practice. Also if you’re worried that my sister who is six years younger than me stayed until 930, nope she didn’t, she actually had a bedtime. Ha.
College, I was sorta on a schedule my first two years since I was a cheerleader. It kept me in line (not the right words, but you get it). Once I stopped cheerleading, I kind of fell off for a while and just did whatever. That’s when I started working and work helped me balance life again. That’s the word, balance. I mean other factors were in there sure but the work- school balance kept me balanced in life.
My job. Yep we are talking about it again. In the medical field there is no such thing as a set schedule unless you work on a rotation and those are rough. It is a set schedule but your schedule looks like this: Monday, Tuesday WORK. Wednesday, Thursday OFF. Friday, Saturday, Sunday WORK. Now flip it. Rough, I told ya. So anyways when I started at the job I have now we could set our schedule based off a few guidelines but I had control. We no longer really have that control and my world feels turned upside down. Yeah sometimes I manage 8 days off in a row but then sometimes I work 6 out 7 days in a row and these are 12 hour shifts people plus my business, a husband and a baby.
I just feel like I can’t get a grasp on this whole work-life balance and it’s literally turning my world upside down. Plus we are being slightly micromanaged at work which is making me feel like I am not keeping up with everything else in life like I should. AKA I feel like I have no control.
So a life coach to help me through this debacle. A psychiatrist to help me figure everything out. Then hopefully, I’ll be Amy again. Good days and bad days still happen but we are heading in the right direction.
Until next time,
yall, autocorrect corrects my name to Many lol